Love stinks sometimes...

Maybe some of the guys out there will feel me on this one. Do you ever wonder why guys chase girls? Of the girls you have actually chased, how many have you actually caught? Sometimes I wonder for those of us who don’t want to be single for the rest of our lives, what is the point when a girl (not all girls obviously) seems to always be looking for better, faster, richer, or whatever the case may be? Being a good guy or more specifically being a Christian who avidly seeks God does not seem to be enough for some girls in our society anymore. You have to be the next best thing in Pop Culture with a record album, a cool hairdo, and a contract for a swimsuit calendar. I realize this may be a stereotypical, pessimistic way of looking at love, but in some regards, is it not true? The same can be said for males. How many males are looking for a slim Blonde (natural or not) with blue eyes? It might even explain why half the girls in the United States insist on being blonde…guys look for it.

I get sick of playing the mind games, and when you decide to be honest, what are the chances your honesty is only going to get shot down? While I believe it is hard to wait on a guy in the traditional sense (if that is your approach to dating for females), think about how difficult it is for a guy to put himself out there. It hurts when the girl says, “No.” Perhaps that is why girls are no longer asked out as much. When rejection becomes a main factor, why ask in the first place? If I had the choice, I would rather wait to be asked out than having to be the one that asks girls out, but that role in the dating world of America is not going to change any time soon. In other words, waiting is the easy part; asking, when often times only leads to rejection, is the hard part. Guys can’t exactly just sit still filtering through choices. My parents explained to me back in the day dating was just fun. It didn’t necessarily mean you were going to be a relationship with the person or get married. It was just fun to go out, watch a movie, eat a meal, and if you did like the girl, maybe kiss her, “Good Night.” Please realize I do not take the physical aspect of a relationship lightly. I just get tired when asking for a date always has to be so serious. If a girl says, “Yes,” who knows? She might be surprised. She might have fun. When she wasn’t looking, she might even find the man she was looking for when originally the thought to answering such a question, “Will you go out with me for dinner some time?” was “No.”

Recently, I dated a girl who is honestly a fascinating individual. She is pretty. She is fun to be around. She is stellar creative. And to the best of my knowledge, she appeared to have a relationship with God. She told me that she “loved me,” “adored me,” and “that I was the best boyfriend she ever had.” Well, that girl moved away from where I currently live and decided things were a little rough long distance. All of a sudden those feelings or facts as mentioned before didn’t matter so much. And if “I was the best boyfriend yet,” she obviously didn’t mind the risk of losing that. At least, when I asked her to speak up on several occasions, her silence was deafening. I thought for sure she would say, “Let’s give this a go.” But when did treating people like disposable income become right? When was losing the “best you ever had” searching for the next best thing okay? Perhaps I can understand why the hopeless romantics, like myself, become so cynical after so much heart ache. The fact that divorce rates go up each year should prove some validity to the ideas that I propose. When marriage gets hard, some people bale, hoping the next marriage brings back fuzzy feelings that once were existent in the previous marriage.

My parents often wonder why I want to leave the country after I finish school. One major reason is because I believe some countries still have people who know how to treat each other like decent human beings. The elderly are not stuck in nursing homes for the convenience of a career. In fact, the elderly may be the most revered people in the family. What an elderly person says goes, and there is no arguing about it. Poor people are not spit on as they ask for money. Men and women are not like cattle in a shopping market; you discard everything until you find the best piece. Even though this metaphor is often used for women, I think it can still be used for men as well. People are not price tags that you shop through. People have feelings. People have stories. People have hearts. And sometimes I think people are so caught up in chasing materialistic wonderlands they forget what is like to be human once again. When you grow up on top, perhaps you expect that you have right to stay there, looking down upon people who are not so fortunate to be in the “cream of the crop.”

I backpacked through Europe last spring for six weeks. It was an incredible experience! I met an amazing girl from the Czech Republic. I spent about seven to eight days hanging out with this girl. Honestly, she struggled with her English, but Lord knows I could not and still cannot correctly pronounce one word in Czech. Even though she was conscientious of her English skills, that was the least of my worries. When I spent time with her or even covered the expenses of a few meals, it meant something to her. It was not just a routine thing. A nice guy was respected. A nice guy was a keeper. A nice guy was just treated like a decent human being. And when I was with her (a woman like that), this nice guy felt like Superman. If I could find a girl like that in the United States, then perhaps the tone of this BLOG entry would be more positive, but I am not sure that is going to happen any time soon in the near future. Perhaps God will surprise me when I least expect it; I will meet a sweet girl here in the states, or better yet, a girl from the Czech Republic might move to Alabama.