11th Day...mixed feelings today.

Today I just was not feeling it. Do you ever have one of those days where you look up and just say, “What are You doing?” “What am I doing?”

Those types of feelings have surrounded my existence and my enjoyment for that matter. I have found some contentment in this little experiment of mine.

I think that I am learning that you need to fulfilled in what you are doing. If you do not feel fulfilled, then you might walk around with a heavy heart and an empty stomach as I do.

Today was not a bad day for the happiness project. I have been struggling with the eating factor – I do love my sweets! And I was late again this morning. Tomorrow I will be eight for eight and proud to report as such when I type in this blog entry again Wednesday night.

5th Day - A Mulligan!

So on the fifth day, I slept 12 hours…..so that day does not really count.

So now that makes today the real fifth day, and with a mulligan here I have accomplished all eight goals except being on time to work again…..like five minutes late. The reasons for this 21 day challenge are to improve in these eight areas. Seven out of eight is not perfect, but it is progress, and by my 30^th birthday, these goals are going to be habit because I spent a year of my life pursuing a Happiness Project to glorify God!

This year I have really learned a lot about leadership, those who stink and those who rock! I have observed that in my own opinion the leaders who stink are those who ignore their followers. I also have lost respect for leaders who waffle day to day, meaning those who act differently based on stress, anxiety, or their mood – LAME! We are we are. So fake does not fly by with me. I understand that we have good and bad days, but I think it speaks well of a leader to maintain tranquility – maintaining composure. We should lead effectively in the same manner despite the storms that surround us.

It is funny how leaders around me are teaching me what I do not want to be like and what I do based on their good or sometimes bad examples…..funny how that works! Those who are miserable with their lives tend to make the worst leaders. You have to find contentment somewhere in-between the routine day to day progress. I will not check email, make phone calls, and perform monotonous data entries for the rest of my life…..

I can’t, and I won’t. I believe God made each and every one of us to do more than we settle for. If my own father will attest to anything, it is the fact that I will not settle. I want the best God has in store for me, or I do not want it at all. I think you know what I mean.

A New Inspiration – You Typically Get the Furthest When You Work the Hardest

I really do not follow golf all that much because quite frankly I think it is really boring to watch on television, but today I was touched by a player who finished runner up in the PGA Championship – Jason Dufner. The announcers today mentioned that Dufner practices perhaps harder than any other player on the tour, very much similar to his mentor Vijay Singh. Together they swing and swing and swing. Dufner was the last player to leave at the club the last night of the tournament because he was practicing. While I do believe one can sometimes practice too much in the midst of a major tournament, one can never work too hard in the game of life! I do not honestly believe Dufner is one of the best players on the tour, but he works the hardest among many of the players out there! I have found that in my life this has often been true for me with my own ambitions, goals, and dreams. I am not the best at what I do. I just work harder than the average person to achieve what I seek to accomplish, hence I am writing this blog entry so late into the night. While I am a night owl, it demonstrates that I take both this 21 Day Happiness Project challenge and my writing very seriously, putting in the hours to become better at what I do. Those who have natural abilities never tend to have to work that hard. I almost feel sorry for them because they never truly learn the meaning of hard work and therefore the gratification when goals are established and accomplished.

I cannot predict what will happen in the future with my writing, my photography, or my place in ministry. I can just say that like Dufner I am going work my tail off to get there. I am going to my best. I will work harder than 90% of the general population to finish in that upper 10%. I will not become a notorious anybody because I just have the natural talent to do so. I will become someone who moves God’s Kingdom forward because I will not quit working hard until I did so.

I have done well with the seven areas of improvement today, but I am going to add an eighth: be on time. This mainly refers to work. Sometimes I am five or ten minutes late which some may not consider a big deal, but I just think it is a bad habit I care to improve.

So we naturally have the following eight:

1.) Floss every day.

2.) Read God's Word, two chapters, like Booker T. Washington once did.

3.) Pray for the blessings of others, expanding my territory (Prayer of Jabez).

4.) Write every day, hence the blog entries.

5.) Eat healthy with an occasional sweet – today I had fat free yogurt.

6.) Memorize Scripture.

7.) Enjoy listening to music – really listen, relax, and enjoy it.

8.) Be on time.

I hope that Mr. Dufner would be proud here. I was certainly proud of his performance as a fellow Auburn Tiger – War Eagle to the fellow Auburn graduate! Congratulations on today’s amazing performance.

2nd and 3rd days of the 21 Day Challenge

I think every now and then we need a break from everything. Well, Friday and Saturday, I took a break from all my new goals. I slept several hours and just tried to relax as we capped a new enrollment and semester where I work. I was more disciplined for my fourth day.

My Happiness Project - Seven Things I Am Committing To for 21 Days

As I now work immersed in the corporate world of proprietary education, I have learned a great deal about what it is like to labor in an environment with somewhat rigid guidelines. One major personal development that we must all face is this: you must let the small things go! You must be careful to pick your battles. And some of the things we get so easily upset about end up really not being that big of a deal anyway. There are so many things/lessons in life that we cannot control. If God is teaching me anything right now - it is that! He is in control! I am not! It sounds so simple, but if you are a believer in Jesus Christ, you know that many of us spend a lifetime handing our lives over to His control.

I recently purchased a book called The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. I will not go so far as to say that the book is changing my life (not just yet at least), but it has spurred this twenty-one day improvement adventure I about to embark upon. There is a list of seven small goals I would like to accomplish everyday for the next twenty-one days starting now.

Church of the Highlands is currently implementing 21 Days of Prayer - this is my version of that discipline but application taken from the book, The Happiness Project. In this journey, I will also be writing a blog entry for everyday that I have ready access to the web for those of you who want to keep up with my progress. I am happy to say that on the first day I am seven for seven – accomplishing each of the seven tasks listed below.! As I embark on this 21 day journey, I will archive how well I do on these seven goals in addition to explaining why I have enjoyed this book, why it is becoming a special piece of literature to me as I seek to self-improve my life and my relationship with God.

1. Floss everyday.

2. Read God's Word, two chapters, like Booker T. Washington once did.

3. Pray for the blessings of others, expanding my territory (Prayer of Jabez).

4. Writer everyday, hence the blog entries.

5. Eat healthy with an occasional sweet – today I had fat free yogurt.

6. Memorize Scripture.

7. Enjoy listening to music – really listen, relax, and enjoy it.

While these might seem like really small trivial things, change does in fact come one step at a time – you will see that writing about it will indeed keep me accountable because I am publicly and honestly putting myself out there.

29 years old.

“The whole world wants you to be miserable. It wants you to put your head down, sigh to yourself and give up on being happy, and I know just as well as anyone that sometimes, giving up seems like the only option, but if you take one thing away from this record, I hope it’s this: Don’t give those people an inch. Stand your ground every chance you get because everybody deserves a chance to be happy.” –The Wonder Years.

On July 19, I turned twenty-nine years old. I must say that the 365 days from my 28^th birthday to my 29^th birthday has probably measured up to one of the worst and best years of my life. I continue to vent frustration, disappointment, and anger to someone who recently became my best Alabamian friend. We are sometimes joined at the hip as we stroll in a joy ride at three miles an hour down the side walk of the Summit strip mall maybe occasionally catching a cute glimpse. Then frustrated individuals behind us get so angry because with a new subwoofer in a new truck music blares as the punk rock indie group named The Wonder Years announces how great life is with the theme of succeeding in the midst of unfavorable odds.

My new friend and wing man sidekick, Matt Calhoun, has a bold understanding of what it means to be content and what it means to be a good friend. He has the most positive attitude and outlook on life of anyone I know. Recently I have been downtrodden because individuals from this past year, some that I considered dear friends, still continue to ignore me because of a disability I could not and still to some extent cannot control. With Matt, I never had to beg him to be my friend – he just was and is! He saw me as an equal opportunist in the Lord’s eyes to become great at whatever dreams I pursue. Matt never ignored me for any reason! I think that is what makes a great leader, addressing the concerns of those who wish to express them so desperately. It is really amazing. All he did was listen.

As a leader in ministry, I will never turn my back on the underprivileged as many in my own experience have, even recently. I think that is why I feel so vibrantly passionate about fighting for the fatherless of the cause of orphan ministry. In the eyes of an orphan, I see a mirror of my own life-an abandoned castaway.

At 29 years of age, I am pledged to fulfilling what I have called my own happiness project, but this year of growth begins a blog entry of this nature with three main tenets. First, I will not let the reactions, reflections, and insults of others claim my own happiness by allowing what other people think of me affect the way I think of myself. I may lose faith in leadership of those above me, but I will not lose faith in whom and what God has created me to be-James Cartee. BE ME!

Secondly, I will not be a leader like those who have silently assassinated me with the hurt in their lack of words and communication. It is one thing to be scared of what you do not understand, thus resulting in inactivity. It is quite another to belligerently ignore a brother in Christ hurting for the feelings of reaffirmation that have long been lost. I will not ignore those who are in need as some have me.

Thirdly, I am learning to let things go. I believe this also extends into not taking things so seriously. Sometimes I think I am so serious I forget to just have a little fun. Life is hard enough as it is. Do not take the joy away, or you might find there is no joy to give.

“The whole world wants you to be miserable. It wants you to put your head down, sigh to yourself and give up on being happy, and I know just as well as anyone that sometimes, giving up seems like the only option, but if you take one thing away from this record, I hope it’s this: Don’t give those people an inch. Stand your ground every chance you get because everybody deserves a chance to be happy.” –The Wonder Years.