Days 25-27
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I have recently had trouble sleeping. I cannot peg any one reason why I do not sleep. Usually I just cannot get comfortable. My mind always thinks. The ideas/concerns flowing through my head sometimes never seem to stop. Like many things in life, I believe that sleep is a discipline….going to bed at a reasonable hour which I usually do….sitting still (Psalm 46:10)….and trying to slow one’s cognitive train of thought. I think for busy people, which pretty much includes everyone on the planet depending on what you choose to be busy with, it becomes difficult to step off the treadmill. We have trouble just stopping to sleep peacefully. While taking a break in life to write my book, I have literally been studying this idea of peace. How do we achieve it? How do we enter into the stillness of God? Among my subjects of study have been different Scriptures, a devotional book that has daily studies on the subject of peace, a book entitled Finding Peace by Charles Stanly, and different meditational practices. I have been thinking about taking a week just to meditate in the mountains. There are retreat centers that specialize in individual retreats. Some of them you can even work at for half the day to cover room and board for that night. While some of you busy people may think this is a waste of time, I believe the ability to find peace in the middle of life’s storms will long benefit my walk with Christ in the future. I also believe that if I can transition from a treadmill mentality to a true stillness moment of the Lord I will benefit from that sudden talent of consciousness. That is perhaps the reason for my current inquiries of study: to sit still in the Presence of the Lord to become rejuvenated not only in sleep but in relationship with Him. This is kind of deep, but I still think this is a relevant concept to everyone’s life that has a walk with the Lord.
Today in church I was awestruck with a reminder of what is significant for a believer’s perspective. I believe this directly relates to a moment of stillness with the Lord because if you are able to achieve this mentality you will truly reach a moment where nothing but God’s eternal salvation and love far outweighs anything in life and in the moment of devotion wherever you happen to be. Allow me to further explain.
I have been caught up in my writing recently. I get so jazzed up if a notable author emails me back with a chance to meet him or her. To respect this person’s privacy to remain unnamed, I am grabbing coffee with a reputable author in the Birmingham, Alabama area tomorrow, and I am really excited to learn from the experience of other people especially this author. I honestly was kind of surprised he personally returned my email but was still thankful that he did. Those who succeed can truly teach those who seek to succeed how to succeed. I spend a good deal of time analyzing testimonies, writing new chapters, and updating this blog as well as Social Media elements. I get caught up in the excitement of what I am learning and the true belief that my story will be published. These are very much earthly things, and while I am learning to write (and passionately love the process), it really does not matter. If you are reading, you may be shocked to read such a thing. What really matters in my relationship with the Lord is that I will spend eternity with Him. I squander in my consumption of thoughts in self-misguided directions towards myself. In other words, I do not perceive reality as eternity in an eternal mindset. I see things as they are in the earthly realm through stress, pressure (usually self-imposed), self-discovery, goals, maybe liking a girl, and the list goes on and on. But it all means nothing without eternity with Christ. I forget that I work to glorify God. I forget that I sleep to glorify God. I forget that I eat and brush my teeth after a meal to glorify God perhaps because in a self-cognitive moment I am thinking of myself instead of Him. This is obviously a lifelong lesson to master, and I do not mean to insinuate that the ability to experience the true stillness of God’s Spirit with an eternal perspective is an easy thing. It truly is not! But I think it begins with realizing that the most important things in our lives start with people. It starts with relationships….ultimately coming down to our number one concern in relationship, our walk with Jesus Christ. Now that is a place to find peace! And if you die (I am surely not wishing such upon you by any means.), you will find hope and security knowing that you will be with Jesus Christ, the Father, and the Holy Spirit.
Now if you will notice the picture below, this is my nephew in the hospital after his second major surgery with his hypoplasic heart condition. The choice is obviously clear. Should I be concerned with writing a book or the life of one of the most meaningful relationships that has entered into the existence of this family, my nephew, Ayden James Mills? His middle name is not James, but that would be really cool if it was. Back to my concluding point here, my focus should be on the eternal, the relationships I have that will transcend into eternity. Now if something lasts forever, it is truly those relationships including this little guy below. Word.
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